No matter where parents look at it, the child is always the victim when they separate. Why? Aside from having to endure a life with a broken family, the child has to go through more painful experiences such as when one or both parents start to file for a child custody case.
If you are one of those parents who are having a hard time to get started on filing for a child custody case because of mixed emotions and guilty feelings, then the best way would be to settle all your ill feelings first. Find it in yourself that this is something inevitable and is really beyond your control. Knowing in yourself that this is something that needs to be done for the betterment of the child will fuel your drive to fight for your child’s custody.
Experts—lawyers and psychologists—agree that parents should be one hundred percent physically, emotionally and psychologically fit before filing a child custody case since this will require utmost attention and focus on the subject matter. Until issues concerning guilt and emotional stability are settled, parents are not advised to file for a child custody case.
Dealing with outcomes
Parents might not be aware of this but filing for a child custody case will have so many effects on the child more than they could imagine. Since the child is the center of the entire proceeding, he or she will feel the burden of the hearing more than anybody else. Here are some of the effects that a child custody case hearing might bring in child:
1. Lack or loss of self esteem. Kids who are out in between clashing parents are prone to losing their self esteem. This is because they feel that they no longer have anybody to validate their skills and capability on what they can do and what they are doing especially in the school.
2. Withdrawal from the outside world. Kids who went through the painful process of child custody cases are usually the ones who start withdrawing from the outside world. They tend to withdraw from everybody else—parents, friends, and classmates—and would prefer to be on their own since they are afraid that people will ask him or her on the details of the child custody case which he or she no longer wishes to be reminded of.
3. Too much shyness. Since kids feel embarrassed with all the things that have occurred, discussed and divulged during the child custody case hearing, they will develop extreme shyness that will hamper their social communication skills and may eventually affect his or her overall personality.
4. Low performance in school. Studies show that kids—especially those who have witnessed painful separation of parents or those who went through child custody cases—tend to perform lower than expected in their schools since their minds are distracted with all that has been going on in their respective families and worry too much on what’s in store for them in the future.
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